Lianne Perry, MA, MSc., RCC Moving forward can mean choosing not to reopen a door you worked hard to close. You finally feel like you’re getting somewhere. You’re checking your phone less, you’re not replaying every conversation quite as often, and maybe you’ve stopped wondering whether you should reach out. You might even have had a few days where you felt surprisingly okay, and the relationship wasn’t the first thing you thought about when you woke up. Then, seemingly out o

Lianne Perry, MA, MSc., RCC When someone repeatedly challenges your reality, trusting your own perception can become surprisingly difficult. Sometimes a song lands because it puts words to something you’ve experienced but have struggled to explain. Taylor Swift’s Patient Zero is one of those songs. When I first listened to it and watched the video, I wasn’t just paying attention as a Taylor Swift fan. My therapist brain kicked in pretty quickly. The relationship portrayed in

Lianne Perry, MA, MSc., RCC Some things were never yours to carry in the first place. For many people, self-blame becomes so automatic that they don't even notice they're doing it. Someone is upset? It must be something you did. A relationship ends? You immediately begin wondering what you could have done differently. Someone pulls away, becomes distant, or responds with frustration? Your first instinct is to look inward and ask, "What did I do wrong?" Taking responsibility f